Self Love

Loving Yourself

I don’t know about ya’ll, but I’ve been extremely hateful to myself for the last couple of weeks. I’ve talked negatively to myself, which I know better then to do. I’ve not showered, I’ve been lazy, I’ve withdrawn from friends and family. And well, today, I’m putting a stop to it.  A stop to the punishing of myself for things out of my control.  Because after all, we can’t control everything that happens. But what we can control is how we feel in the moment of what’s happening. We can choose to be as happy or as sad as we want to.  We can choose to make ourselves feel better or worse simply by changing the words we speak to ourselves.

Loving Words of Affirmation

We are harder on ourselves then any other person could ever be. The words we say to ourselves inside our own minds hurt us more then the words of everyone else.  Start speaking words of affirmation to yourself instead of words of negativity.  Here are a few examples:  Okay, so it’s raining outside.  Instead of saying, “Ugh, it’s so dreary, I’m going to be so down today because of this rain.” Try saying, “It’s raining outside, I’ll find something fun to do today inside to brighten my mood.” You know, it is what it is.  It’s just rain.  It’s not dreary, it’s not gloomy, it’s just rain.  Here’s another one: “I look terrible. The lines on my face are getting deeper, my clothes are so tight they’re uncomfortable, I’ve gotten so fat and out of shape.” Replace that with, “I will start getting more sleep, drinking more water and less caffeine.  Today I’ll make some better food choices, and get back onto my workout plan.  Not because I look terrible, but because working out and eating right feels good, puts me in a better mood, and is so healthy for me and I love me.”

So you get the idea…It’s not that you won’t have negative thoughts, you will, we all do.  And a big mistake a lot of us make is we just try not to think that way.  But what’s important is that you take that negative thought, remove it, and replace it.  If you don’t replace your negative thought with a positive one, you’ll continue to repeat the negative thought.  Throw it out, stomp on it, but then replace it and smile.

Cause I’m not there yet, but perhaps, Soon Enuff.

Peace & love,

Amy

I am a published author of the book, Soon Enuff, which is available worldwide on Amazon.

I am a Certified Life Coach with specialties in surviving Psychological Abuse and Happiness Therapy.

You may email me at: amereelynne45@gmail.com

Follow and like my blog to receive updates and important information 🙂

 

 

The Moon & Me

Affects of the Moon on Emotions

The Full moon can cause violent behavior.  There have been studies proving that there are more incidents of homicide and aggravated assaults around a full moon.  While not everyone will turn violent, I have definitely noticed that I tend to be more aggravated and quick to anger in the days approaching a full moon.

Full Moon can lead to a lack of sleep which affects your moods.  Ever notice a few days before a full moon you suddenly start waking up earlier or not being able to fall asleep? Studies have shown that we tend to experience less time spent in the deepest phase of sleep nearing a full moon, which then affects our moods.

Full Moon can make you feel more introspective.  Have you ever noticed a few days before the full moon you start to reflect more on your life and what’s happening in it?

A full moon can make you feel more anxious, it brings about more energy and unless you’re doing something with that extra energy it can cause nervousness, make you feel manic, and cause nightmares.

The full moon can make you go from being very loving to very combative, which in turn, can make you feel crazy.

The Moon & Emotions

I think the best thing we can do for ourselves is keep track of the moon phases.  Be mindful of the days before a New Moon or Full Moon.  Become more aware of what’s causing you to feel a certain way, especially when it’s out of character.  The one thing I’ve made the mistake of is not realizing until it was too late, like the moon is already full.  I wonder why I’ve been insane for the past week. Too quick to anger, totally out of control at times, not sleeping well.  Feeling “frisky, like really frisky,” and then just as quickly not wanting anything to do with anyone.  Then all of a sudden, I’m like, oh, the moon is full tonight, and the next morning I feel fully released, back to normal.

Hope this helps with some of the things you find yourself struggling with.  The great thing about the moon is that it does tend to bring things to the surface.  If you can keep control of your emotions by realizing what’s causing them, you can benefit from the moons phases greatly.

Cause I’m not there yet, but perhaps….Soon Enuff

Peace & love,

Amy

I am a published author of the book, “Soon Enuff.” Available worldwide on Amazon.

I’m also a Certified Life Coach with specialties in surviving psychological abuse and happiness therapy.

You may email me at amereelynne45@gmail.com

Follow and like this blog to receive updates and alerts 🙂

The Situation….

What’s your situation….

Recently I have found myself lost in a situation that I can’t quite name because I’m unsure of what the situation actually is.  I think it’s a dilemma that many of us face throughout our lives.  However, this is the first time that it has taken such a toll on me.

See the situation for what it is…

I believe the first step to solving this problem is to see the situation for what it is, I know, I know, this is hard to do when you don’t know what the situation is.  However, if you sit down and write out exactly what’s going on you may find it easier to understand it, possibly even give it a name.

I have found myself in a position where I’m really unsure of my place in my own life. For 31 years my life has been centered around caring for children, running my business, basically taking care of everyone else.  Suddenly and quite frankly without warning, my life has been turned upside down.

My grandfather passing away and grandmother needing help called me out of town to care for both of them for a short time and never did I imagine the impact this would take.  I’ve seen death before, but this time it has really hit me hard.  There is a lot of guilt that I didn’t do enough, a lot of guilt that I couldn’t help my grandmother enough, and upon returning to my regular life I found that it is no longer my regular life. Things changed, maybe I was the cause of those changes, maybe I wasn’t, but whatever the case I found myself in a situation that I couldn’t understand nor give a name to. My place and importance to others feels diminished and I’m left at age 50 wondering what’s next for me, what is my role, what is my position, where do I go from here. A situation that has caused me a lot of pain and probably placed me far too deep in thought.

Now Handle the Situation

So this morning I got up and wrote down exactly what I think is happening and why and whether these things are true for anyone else, they’re certainly true for me.  I have named my situation, “The Highway of Life, and the Dangerous Curves I have to Maneuver.” I call them dangerous curves because it is dangerous to approach these curves without caution.  They have definitely thrown me for a loop and quite frankly I’ve been spiraling out of control. However, now that I’ve slowed down and can approach the curves a little more cautiously I’ve found that I can maneuver them without crashing.  It doesn’t mean I’m okay with everything, it means I’m handling it without slipping off the side of the road and bounding down a hill.

Life is often cruel and unkind, especially to the empaths that feel and think too much.

    situation

I have found that learning new things is very helpful.  Life is constantly changing and if you don’t learn to change with it, you’ll be left behind. So set some new goals, keep them to yourself, and then go out and smash them.  Try some new things, be kind to yourself. Realize life is what you make it, and though it’s painful, sometimes it’s just life and you need to adjust, what other choice do we have?  We’re all growing older, we’re all changing, this is the world we live in.  So name your situation and then change it to your benefit.

Cause I’m definitely not there yet, but perhaps, Soon Enuff…

My book, Soon Enuff, is on sale on Amazon through Thanksgiving.  If you haven’t picked up your copy yet, now is a great time.

https://www.amazon.com/Soon-Enuff-Amy-Lopez/dp/0692902392

 

 

The Moon & Me

Full Moon impact on Me

About a week ago I began feeling very distant from everyone, like perhaps I was invisible, and at times, I wish I actually was.  My thoughts become a bit erratic, and I wasn’t making much sense to anyone, except myself.  And I thought to myself, “Okay, what’s going on with you Amy?”

After checking my horoscope I realized how quickly the full moon/strawberry moon was approaching, and I knew full well what was up with me.  I think once you know what’s possibly causing your emotions to fluctuate it’s much easier to control them, or at least to try to calm them down a bit.

Full Moon Poetry

I know I’m often distant

and my thoughts are rarely clear

and like the moon you can’t always see me

but I promise you I’m here….

–Amy–

 

Wishing you a beautiful week!

Cause I’m not there yet, but perhaps, Soon Enuff…

Love & Peace, Amy

Self Worth

Many times when we experience heart ache or loss we tell ourselves we aren’t worthy of happiness, of love, of joy.

We think that just because we love someone with all our heart they should automatically love us back and unfortunately that’s just not how life is.  Everyone has a right to their own feelings, choices of who they love and no one can dictate or make someone feel something they don’t.

We often tell ourselves in this situation that it’s okay, “we can love enough for the both of us.” Reality is, that can never work.  If someone doesn’t love you do you really want them in your life?  Do you really want to cling to something that you already know is never going to happen?

I say no, we need to accept what is and let go of what we hoped it would be.  It’s the only way to truly be happy…

Just because he didn’t love you doesn’t mean you’re not worth loving…” –Amy–

Realize that you are worthy of love that you are worthy of happiness and joy.  Just because one person doesn’t return your feelings, doesn’t mean you’re not worth loving. It’s just that maybe that person was never meant for you…move on, love will find you one day but in the meantime love yourself…

Cause I’m not there yet, but perhaps, Soon Enuff…

Peace & love always,

Amy

Count the Sunrises…..

“Life goes by so fast, have you ever counted the sunrises that have passed?” -Amy-

Sometimes I complain because I don’t feel like I ever get enough sleep, but this morning I was so grateful that I’m an early riser.  I really hate to miss a sunrise, especially one like this morning.

I’m one that is very nostalgic,  always thinking about my favorite moments, things that remind me of those moments, smells, sights, tastes, etc.  So I do tend to count the days, weeks, months that it’s been since an important event has happened.  I miss that moment, I think about it, and I try to think of it fondly, not in a sad way, and then, I usually feel better about it.

I hope you take this weekend to remember some of the most fond memories you have, but most importantly to make some new memories that years from now, you’ll think back on and remember with love.

Peace & love

Cause I’m not there yet, but perhaps, Soon Enuff…..

 

The Journey is the Joy….

If you’re like me, and I’m sure millions of others, we all have that “one arrival point” the one where we think, “ok, this is where I’ll be happy, this is when I’ll know, I’ve arrived..” Maybe it’s when your last child leaves the house, when you make partner at your firm, when you park that new Mercedes in your driveway, pay off your house, retire with a big savings…

The funny thing is, I had all those thoughts too, but you know what, now I’ve gone past at least two of those marks in my life, and now I find that I have more new marks….still more waiting for all my dreams to come true, still more goals…

You see, I’m finding that in this life, there is no “one mark”, there’s no end game, there’s no “i’ve finally reached my happily ever after..”.  Truth is, our final destination is death, that’s the end mark.

I think of yesterday as a sunset, tomorrow a sunrise, only today do we have enough light to share our love and to really live.  You see the burdens of yesterday are what drive people crazy, thinking of all we need to do tomorrow  make us feel defeated, we can only live in the moment.

So for myself, and I hope for you, I’m going to chase more waterfalls, smell more flowers, go outside barefoot, say I love you more, climb more mountains, watch more sunsets, watch more sunrises, spend more time laughing and less crying.

Life can only be lived as we go along,  joy is found in the journey and in the moment, not in a “point of arrival”….

Peace & Love

Cause I’m not there yet, but perhaps, Soon Enuff….

 

 

Dreams or Reality….

Good Morning!

I hope this beautiful Saturday finds you well and excited for a new day!

I want to touch base today on reality and dreams.  I’ve struggled with it myself, and would love to hear how you’ve dealt with similar situations.

Have you ever had a dream that touched your reality for just a very short time in your life?  But it was so profound that it has become an obsession.  You continue chasing that feeling you had by that touch.  Maybe it was love or lust or happiness or some other emotion that really hit home with you.  However, the moment was fleeting, and now you have to face the reality that the moment is passed.  How do you do that?  How do you face that reality?

Well, most of us actually don’t face it.  We may seem like we do, but in reality, we just busy ourselves with more things.  It may be work, texting, or calling, anyone and everyone, just to keep our mind off the fact that we need to move on.  We don’t physically want to move on, we want to feel those feelings again so we put off the fact that we aren’t going to feel that way again.  Not that we’ll never feel good again, just not that particular feeling.

So today, I challenge you, and myself, just for today, not promising tomorrow, let yourself feel.  Let yourself grieve, be sad, be upset, whatever emotion it is, let yourself feel it.  Understand that you deserve to feel it, it happened to you, it’s ok to feel the things you’re feeling, it doesn’t make you a failure.  I’m not saying to “waller in misery.”  But unless you let yourself go through it, painful as it may be, you’re never going to get over it, and you’re never going to face reality, you’re going to continue to live a dream life, one that’s made up in your head, and that’s not good for your mind, soul, or body.

Then tonight, when you close your eyes, tell yourself your’e okay, that you made it through the day and tomorrow will be a new day that you’ll also make it through.  One day at a time, step by step, letting yourself feel whatever it is, just be present in your own life, but make sure it’s real….

See ya’ll on Monday!!

Cause I’m not there yet, but perhaps, Soon Enuff….