A Pause in Normality….

A New Normal

As I reflected on all that’s been going on I started to realize that Covid-19, as awful as it is, has also brought some much needed light to a lot of things that were already happening. We’ve just been too busy or blind, or whatever you want to call it to see it before now.

I do not want, in any way, to minimize how awful this virus is, but I do want to bring a positive light to this pandemic, as this truly is an opportunity to change the way we move forward from here. What will it look like as states start to “re-open?” Will we continue down the road we’ve been on, or will we look at what’s not working and do our best to make a change?

Today as I was scrolling through social media I came upon a post that said something to this effect: “If I see one more person talking about how they’re growing a garden, or making their own baby food or making their own dog food or learning to cook or sew, etc. I’m going to delete them.”  It occurred to me that there is a battle of sorts between who wants to get back to their “normal lives” and those, like myself, who realize, that “normal” was not working, and we are seeking a “new normal.”

What is Normal

This virus has brought to light the control that the government has over us all.  They have mandated that we cannot leave our homes unless it is for “essential” things.  The thing is, who are they to decide what is essential?  I can tell you that going to fast food restaurants is not essential for me.  But you know what is….. yoga class for my mental and physical well being.  Being able to see my Physical Therapist, since I had surgery just 3 months ago.  Talking one on one with my therapist. All these things weren’t even of any value to My President.  This was a real eye opener for me.

Back in October of 2019 my grandfather passed away and I have been in deep contemplation over the process ever since.  Long before this virus we were already tossing our grandparents and parents into nursing homes or assisted living homes because we are too busy to take care of them or because we simply cannot stand the process of aging and want to hide it away as much as we can.  Now with Covid-19 it is shedding light on how dire the situation actually is.  We have locked the elderly away even further, allowing no visitors.  The caretakers are wearing masks and gloves and there is little to no interaction with the patients.  Mind you, like my grandmother, some are paying 5,000 a month to live like this.  I have asked myself at what point do I decide it’s “safe enough” to go and visit her or try to bring her home with me.  And I wonder what price we are putting on death? My grandmother is 88 years old and when I asked her about it, she said she would give anything for a visit from family.  Someone to just watch TV or read or play a game with her.  She would rather us bring Covid-19 to her, which would most likely kill her. Because as she stated, “The life I”m living is worse than death.”

Another thing Covid-19 has brought to light is this whole social distancing thing.  Are you kidding? We’ve already been social distancing.  How many times do you see families out in public, each on their cell phones? How many parents are having to work 60-80 hours a week and not spending any time with their own children? Social distancing isn’t new, but it is definitely something I don’t want to see increased as part of a “new normal.”

Covid-19 has brought more light on “sanitizing” as well.  For years scientists have been saying that in order to fight off viruses we need to be introduced to a certain amount of bacteria.  Yet for years we’ve been saturating our lives with sanitizers.  Kids no longer play outside without rubbing on hand sanitizer, let alone play with one another.  Our immune systems can only function by interacting with all life and if we never allow any bacteria to be introduced into our life we can’t fight viruses off.  My fear is that we’ll continue to build on this and the new normal will be wearing masks anytime we leave our homes, only furthering our inability to introduce good/bad bacteria to our bodies.

If you think that “normal” was working and that things have been improving for our planet I’d like you do to some research. The obesity rate in the U.S. has risen from 35.7 in 2010 to a whopping 42.4% in 2019.  Suicide has increased 35%  and is now the 10th leading cause of death….10th!!  1 in 6 Americans are now prescribed some type of anti-depressant medication.  Over 11 million children live in “food insecure” homes. 60,000 families with children are homeless on any given night in the U.S. This isn’t a normal we should be proud of, this is a normal we should be leaving behind.

I think it’s awesome some of the things that have been done to help the world right now.  Celebrities coming out with very cool challenges to raise money for Covid-19 relief, government getting a few grants and unemployment out there, (though it is far too little help in my opinion.) But the thing is the majority of these problems were here before Covid-19. Children going hungry, homelessness, our elderly, farming in America, the fast food industry, global crisis, etc. These things were there before, they just aren’t talked about.  We don’t see a daily briefing on all these things, therefore we tend to remain blind to them.  I hope that this pandemic has opened your eyes as it has mine, and that we can move forward and keep the efforts to help heal the earth and each other going and not just stop and become complacent once again after the “all clear alarm” has been sound.

A New Normal

It’s very difficult to wade through these muddy waters.  We don’t really know who or what to believe.  But I implore you, before we all just get “back to normal” let’s take this pause in normality to make new decisions.  We don’t have to remain stuck in old beliefs. This is a time we need to broaden our thinking, seek out answers, find a more sustainable life for ourselves, our families and our communities.

I would love to see your new ideas: Your gardens, your recipes for healthy eating, your exercise routines, your ideas for a better way of life. Your ideas on how to help your own families your own communities.  It’s impossible to save the whole world.  When you look at it on that big of a scope it’s too hard to even fathom.  However, if you start with yourself, your own home, your own kids, your own pets, your own health, your own community or neighborhood, that’s where we can all make a difference.  And once we each start to make a difference, that’s when we create a new and better world.  I don’t know about you, but I don’t want my grand children or great grand children to wonder what a hand shake meant or what a hug felt like.  I want us all to be healthy, healthy enough to fight off these diseases that are undoubtedly going to continue to come.  And that all starts at home. If the fast food industry is your kitchen, please, please, look at your own health, especially what you’re feeding your body and then help others learn what you are learning.  How else can we show compassion for each other?  How else can we help each other become better?

Peace & love

Cause I’m not there yet, but perhaps, Soon Enuff….

Amy

I am a Certified Master Life Coach with specialities in Happiness Therapy and Psychological Abuse Recovery.

I am a published author.  My poetry book, “Soon Enuff” can be found worldwide on Amazon.

Subscribe to my blog to receive updates via email @amereelynne45@gmail.com

**A Personal Normal Note

My family has taken this time to learn how to build three raised gardens.  We will be able to grow enough vegetables to sustain us through the summer and probably through most of the winter.  We are learning to cook healthy vegan meals, that make us feel so much better.  We are learning about what types of foods can heal us without prescription medication.  It’s important for us to look into the nursing home situation a lot more in depth.  It has become important for us to look into the kids that are going hungry in our area and see what we can do about it.  These are the types of things I want to move forward with as part of my new normal.  Not because it will make my life immediately better or that I’ll see a profound change, but because for us, this is what’s important. I am not trying to “toot my own horn,” I’m sharing with you because I want you to share with me.

 

Be All In

How to be all in

Let me start with my own story….so I’ve been working quite awhile on getting out of my own head.  Trying to stop living in my thoughts, in my stories, and just trying to stay present and deal with the truth in every moment.

I’ve been healing from a recent surgery and pretty frustrated frankly with my surgeon and not getting the answers that I’ve been looking for.  So I made an appointment with my general Dr. hoping to get some clarity.  I’ve known I’ve gained some weight after the operation, which has been upsetting because I eat a pretty healthy vegetarian diet but haven’t been able to exercise like for six weeks, however, I hadn’t actually weighed myself.  Upon getting to the Dr. office I stepped on the scale to discover I’ve gained 22 pounds in six weeks since surgery. The Dr. discussed the possibility of what inflammation was doing to my body, some possible kidney issues, etc. but honestly I didn’t hear much of what she was saying.  You see, I immediately went into my head and started hearing the voices from years and years past talking about beautiful bodies, slim figures, etc.  I heard voices and felt past pain from arguments about my weight, hurtful comments about not being in good enough shape or sexually attractive.  All of it, and when I say all of it, I’m talking 20-30 years of stories all dealing with weight issues came rushing in and I immediately took it to heart.  My unhappiness was heavy on my chest.

Are you in

I tried desperately to bring my attention back to my Dr. and to discuss possible reasons for what I was going through, both physically and mentally.  As I left her office and walked down to the lab I started crying.  And as I sat in the chair, I started asking myself, what was going on, what was I feeling.  My stomach was hurting, my heart was aching, and then I thought, “Ok, so what’s really going on, outside the story, what’s really the truth here?” And you know, as soon, as I got my mind quiet and left the story spinning, I realized the truth was I had come to get some answers. My health has been on a roller coaster.  There’s nothing I’m doing that’s causing this weight gain. No one has said anything hateful to me or been unpleasant at all.  I’m actually proud of myself for the way I’ve dealt with this blow to my health.  I just need answers, I need to be my own advocate, I need to deal with what’s happening right now.

Is it easy to be in the moment

No, it wasn’t easy and it didn’t come naturally.  In fact, the remainder of the day I had to repeatedly bring myself back.  “Stop, stop, stop with the stories.” I literally had to tell myself this over and over throughout the day.  But every time I did, I felt relief.  I was still not happy with my situation, but I was living it, I was doing something about it. There was no need to make myself unhappy by adding in all the past stories around weight.  I didn’t need that, I needed to deal with the present.

You see unhappiness isn’t caused by emotions. Unhappiness is emotions plus an unhappy story.  So when you remove the unhappy story you are left with just the emotions and the emotions are ok, you can handle them.  If you need to cry, cry.  If you need to shout, shout.  But hold your head high, walk through that hell like the devil himself invited you.  Once you get to the other side, you’ll feel a relief like no other.

So I”m still in search of answers, I’m being my own advocate, and I’m doing it right now, in this moment, today.  I’m not telling myself stories, I’m living in truth.  I have found that I wasn’t as unhappy as I thought I was. You can’t really be unhappy without an unhappy story.

Cause I’m not there yet, but perhaps, Soon Enuff…

Peace & love

Amy

I am a published author and Master Life Coach with certifications in Happiness Therapy and Mental Abuse.  If you’d like to set an appointment with me, I’d love to talk.  Reach me @ amereelynne45@gmail.com

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Struggles of an Empath

An Empaths struggle is real

On one shoulder sits the empath and on the other the bitch and I’m torn between walking away and trying harder.

As an empath it’s really a struggle to know when I’ve done enough. I give too many chances, love to hard, show too much kindness. Sometimes it literally feels like it’s draining my soul.

Apathy or Empathy

So when is enough enough? When is it time to be a little more apathetic and a little less empathetic? You know I use the term bitch as the opposite of empath but it’s not being a bitch to remove yourself from someone or a situation that is draining you.

empath

Sometimes it’s necessary to your mental health, to your own well being to just get the fuck away from someone that is draining you spiritually and mentally. There’s no reason to feel guilty about it.

There’s no doubt you’ve given it all you could. You’ve probably loved too hard, shown too much kindness, and given everything you have to give, and you know what, for some that will never be Enuff.  That’s when you know, come on, you’ve probably always known, it’s time to exit their lives and to keep a strong distance. Do it for yourself, cause you should love yourself as much as you keep loving everyone else.

Cause I’m not there yet, but perhaps, Soon Enuff.

Peace & love,

Amy

 

I am a published author of the book, Soon Enuff. Available on Amazon.

I’m also a Certified Life Coach with specialties in surviving Psychological Abuse and Happiness Therapy.

You may email me at amereelynne45@gmail.com

I’d appreciate your follow, like and subscribing to my blog for updates and alerts on new posts.