Tag: life lessons

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Get Still

Get still & set an intention

It’s a new day and a brand new beautiful week. Can you take just a few moments for yourself? A little quiet time in meditation.

When we float through our days and weeks with no clear purpose it makes it easy to get lost in our thoughts. It’s so important to take a few moments for yourself every morning, but especially at the beginning of the week.

“Still Time”

You are the most important person in your life. You deserve some “still time.” Get still, write down what your intention for what you want to happen this week is. Then each day, think about that intention. It makes it so much easier to stick to something when you’ve written it down. When you recognize the importance of setting intentions, of making manifestations, and affirmations. You owe it to yourself, to your spouse, lover, friends, family, etc. To be your best you, you’ve got to invest in yourself.

Cause we’re not there yet, bur perhaps together, we’ll get there…...Soon Enuff!

Hey guys, I just uploaded a brand new course in the Course Library! It’s a 4 week course on the Transformational Power of Acceptance. Click the tab above for more information!

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Life’s not Static

Life isn’t static and neither are your life choices

So many struggle with feeling like they’re out of place or that they’re not doing what they are supposed to be doing. This happens to us all at some point. It happens to those that have spent years and years in college or years and years in training to be in a profession that at one point they felt called to be in. And guess what…..it’s totally normal!

Life is in constant motion. Everyday brings about change. So why would we ever think our Life Purpose wouldn’t change? Now it may be that your Life Purpose is similar, maybe you’ve always felt called to “Help others.” And perhaps you began as a therapist, but now you’re feeling called to quit the job force and write self help books. Maybe you were a Doctor in a prestigious hospital but now you feel called to travel to foreign countries and give your services for free. The list is endless. The point is, sometimes we need to say goodbye to callings too.

“Your life purpose doesn’t necessarily stay the same.

There can be goodbyes to callings too.” -Amy Lopez-

Follow your dreams

It’s okay to say goodbye to what you thought would be your life long purpose. It’s okay to start new. And it’s okay if you start new many many times. I think it’s important to listen to your intuition, to meditate on what is calling you and then to pursue your passions with everything you’ve got in you.

After all, life is meant to be lived out loud, to be lived in the present moment. And in the present moment we can’t see into the future. All we can do is what we feel called to do right now, maybe that changes tomorrow and maybe it doesn’t.

If you’d like help with discovering your life purpose in this moment schedule an appointment with me, I’d be glad to discuss with you 🙂

Cause we’re not there yet, but perhaps together we will be, Soon Enuff…..

https://linktr.ee/amylopez

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Self Sabotage

Are you sabotaging your own happiness….

“If there’s one thing I know to be true it’s that we will sabotage our own happiness until we heal and realize we are worth loving….” -Amy Lopez-

Ways we Sabotage…..

Have you ever found yourself floating along blissfully in life? Relationships, work, family, income, everything is going great. Then suddenly, it’s like this little flash goes off in your head and a voice whispers, barely even audible, “This all can’t be happening, you know you don’t deserve this….” and then you start to believe that little voice. You start to get anxious, maybe depressed, and before you know it that voice is telling you, “Let’s fuck it up like we always do.”

Now this voice is probably in your sub-conscious, you don’t actually hear it, and you don’t even know that you are unintentionally starting to fuck things up. Maybe you start getting more argumentative for no reason, just because, well, drama feels more normal to you. Or maybe you start getting ideas of hanging out with people you know are trouble for you. You know, just to cause some unnecessary chaos in your life. Maybe you start talking to someone from your past. You know, because well, your partner hasn’t been paying enough attention to you, so you kind of want to fuck that relationship up too. While all this is a little funny to read, it’s actually really what happens!

One of the worst parts about this cycle is that we don’t just hurt ourselves and sabotage our own happiness, we hurt and sabotage the lives and happiness of those that love us. They are like the innocent by standers in a long drawn out horror film. But why do we do this? Why do we self sabotage? What causes this behavior and how can we stop it before it starts next time?

Answers to Self Sabotage

Self sabotage is caused by self worth, or should I say, lack of it. When we don’t love ourselves, our minds just can’t comprehend that things can be good for too long. When we have past trauma that we haven’t healed from, we continue to carry it into every aspect of our lives. Our relationships, romantic or work related, family, friends, it’s all going to suffer because our minds can’t distinguish the past from the present. We think it’s happened to us so many times, that’s it’s just how life is, it’s not going to change. We don’t realize that essentially we are the ones continuing the cycle. It’s us that refuses to change. You see our ego is so identified with this Victim mentality that it thinks it’s who we are. We are the victim. Our victim ego needs to be fed. So when things are going great, our victim ego is starving. Hungry for drama, for stress, for anxiety. And since life isn’t providing it ample food, our own minds start devise a way to sabotage, to feed our victim mentality. But there is a way out!!

Self help for Sabotage

There is a way out of this of course. Once you realize you have a problem, you’re half way there. Once you realize that you need to deal with some past trauma and that it’s actually your Victim Ego causing you to self sabotage you can change it. The best way….starve that ego. Once you start to give no attention to something it slowly starts to disappear until one day it is gone forever. This will take time and perseverance. It starts with recognizing that you are the problem. It’s the way you’re choosing to respond to life. Life is giving amazing things, showing you love, giving you beautiful gifts, but how are you responding?

Start a gratitude journal. I know it sounds simple, but sometimes the very act of writing down what you’re grateful for, like actually seeing it in black and white right in front of you makes you realize it’s all real. I do this every single morning.

Write some affirmations. Affirmations are positive statements used to replace negative thinking. “I am a loving person and I am loved in return.” “I understand my need to feel loved and protected and so I show that love and protection to those in my life.” You get the idea……

Stay Present. This may be the number one rule of my life, and I hope yours as well. By staying in the present moment we begin to realize the past has no bearing on us any longer. All the trauma from the past is past. We don’t have to let it continue to ruin our futures. Our life is always only right now, in this very moment. And in this very moment you are okay, you are loved, you are beautiful, and most important, you are worthy.

The thing is, until you heal and realize you’re worth loving you literally can’t continue to show love to anyone else. You’re going to continue self sabotaging your own happiness and that happiness of those around you. Start today.

If you’d like help in this area, I’m here for you. You could schedule a short coffee break with me or a longer session. The link to scheduling is listed below….

https://linktr.ee/amylopez/

Cause we’re not there yet….but perhaps, “Soon Enuff.”

Live Present,

Amy

Did you know I have a brand new free course available on Manifestations/Affirmations. What they are and how and when to use them. Check it out before it’s gone 🙂

https://view.flodesk.com/pages/6012bf65e091160e5bd0b26c

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Watch your Problems….

Can you watch your problems instead of getting lost in them?

Problems aren’t generally what they appear to be. You see the real problem is to deal with our reactions to what we believe the problem is. It’s hard to deal with life situations (problems) if you’re feeling anxious, scared, angry, or upset. But can you pull back a bit, just watch your problem before you get totally lost in it?

Problem watching can be a great mindfulness practice!

Once you stop for a moment and look to your inside consciousness instead of to what’s going on on the outside you may find where the change needs to take place. You may even find that the “problem” you thought was coming from something in the world or someone else in the world is actually coming from inside yourself.

Ask yourself questions like, “Where am I feeling this jealousy?” “What am I really angry about?” “What part of my body am I feeling the anxiety in?” Get into a quiet space where you can go deeper. Be mindful of where you’re feeling these emotions. Because remember emotions without a story will just come and go if you let them. If you can stop the narrative inside your mind, just get quiet for even a few moments, do a little self discovery. It’s always a good practice to look inside first. We lay too much blame just strive to get to the truth, to get to the root.

Remember this week…..try just watching your problems instead of becoming lost in them 🙂

“If you define the problem correctly, you almost have the solution.” -Steve Jobs-

Cause we’re not there yet…but perhaps, Soon Enuff!

Live Present,

Amy

Hey guys I have a brand new course out, and it’s absolutely FREE!! If you want to learn the difference between a manifestation and an affirmation and when and how to use each, just click below!

https://view.flodesk.com/pages/6012bf65e091160e5bd0b26c

If you’d like to go a little deeper, I’d love to set up a one on one coffee break appointment with you :). Click the link below.

https://linktr.ee/AmyLopez

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Tools of Choice

How do you choose

Contrary to popular belief, a choice is not a thing, it’s not a noun. A choice is an action you take, a verb. Options are things. And while we can’t always choose all our options, we are the only one that can choose which option to take.

In our society it seems that more means better. Work more hours, volunteer more, make more, see more, do more, always more. The problem is, often the more we do, the less we do. What I mean here is, you can do anything you want, but you can’t do everything. The more you push yourself in one hundred directions, the less you end up doing. You can only give so much of yourself to any one given project. If you’re working on 100 things then you’re only going to be giving 10 percent of yourself to each of those things.

So what tools do we have to help us with the plethora of options we’re given each day? How do we know we are making the right choices? (taking the right actions.) Here’s a 3 tools I have learned that help me with making life choices:

*Be Present (mindful)

When you are living in the present moment and are presented with an option you are more aware of what choice needs to be made. You aren’t concerned with how something turned out in the past, or worried about what this option may or may not turn out to be in the future. You are only aware of what choice you should make for the moment you’re in. This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t think ahead, it means you’re primary focus is on what action you need to take right now, your secondary focus is how will this action affect something in the future.

*Practice Discernment

The problem is we are presented with so many things each day. Some that are easy to discern, we can plainly see they aren’t worth our time. However, what about when we’re presented with several good or great options? We need some real discernment to know when to say no to a good opportunity. What are some questions you can think of to practice discernment? For me, I try to ask myself, “Would this option be vital to my business or my way of life.” Even if it’s a great option, it may not be a vital option.

*Give & Take

Try to remember there is a give & take for every option. If you are unaware of this you’re going to find yourself in some trouble by way of stress. You’ll be over worked, agitated, and most likely you’ll find you’re not doing a very good job. The key is to ask yourself this questions, “If I take on this project/option what will I need to give up to make it work?” Because the thing is, you can do anything you want to, but you cannot do it everything. So when we take on something new, we need to realize something else has got to go or be put on hold for awhile.

If you’d like a great book to read on this subject, “Essentialism” by Greg McKeown is amazing!!

Cause we’re not there yet….but perhaps, Soon Enuff.

Live Present,

Amy Lopez

I have a live 60-90 minute workshop coming on January 25th! Would love to have you join me. For $40 I’ll be giving you invaluable tools to “Multiply Healthy Habits with Intention.“

You may register here :

https://calendly.com/grounded-inthe-present/multiply-healthy-habits-with-intention

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Be All In

How to be all in

Let me start with my own story….so I’ve been working quite awhile on getting out of my own head.  Trying to stop living in my thoughts, in my stories, and just trying to stay present and deal with the truth in every moment.

I’ve been healing from a recent surgery and pretty frustrated frankly with my surgeon and not getting the answers that I’ve been looking for.  So I made an appointment with my general Dr. hoping to get some clarity.  I’ve known I’ve gained some weight after the operation, which has been upsetting because I eat a pretty healthy vegetarian diet but haven’t been able to exercise like for six weeks, however, I hadn’t actually weighed myself.  Upon getting to the Dr. office I stepped on the scale to discover I’ve gained 22 pounds in six weeks since surgery. The Dr. discussed the possibility of what inflammation was doing to my body, some possible kidney issues, etc. but honestly I didn’t hear much of what she was saying.  You see, I immediately went into my head and started hearing the voices from years and years past talking about beautiful bodies, slim figures, etc.  I heard voices and felt past pain from arguments about my weight, hurtful comments about not being in good enough shape or sexually attractive.  All of it, and when I say all of it, I’m talking 20-30 years of stories all dealing with weight issues came rushing in and I immediately took it to heart.  My unhappiness was heavy on my chest.

Are you in

I tried desperately to bring my attention back to my Dr. and to discuss possible reasons for what I was going through, both physically and mentally.  As I left her office and walked down to the lab I started crying.  And as I sat in the chair, I started asking myself, what was going on, what was I feeling.  My stomach was hurting, my heart was aching, and then I thought, “Ok, so what’s really going on, outside the story, what’s really the truth here?” And you know, as soon, as I got my mind quiet and left the story spinning, I realized the truth was I had come to get some answers. My health has been on a roller coaster.  There’s nothing I’m doing that’s causing this weight gain. No one has said anything hateful to me or been unpleasant at all.  I’m actually proud of myself for the way I’ve dealt with this blow to my health.  I just need answers, I need to be my own advocate, I need to deal with what’s happening right now.

Is it easy to be in the moment

No, it wasn’t easy and it didn’t come naturally.  In fact, the remainder of the day I had to repeatedly bring myself back.  “Stop, stop, stop with the stories.” I literally had to tell myself this over and over throughout the day.  But every time I did, I felt relief.  I was still not happy with my situation, but I was living it, I was doing something about it. There was no need to make myself unhappy by adding in all the past stories around weight.  I didn’t need that, I needed to deal with the present.

You see unhappiness isn’t caused by emotions. Unhappiness is emotions plus an unhappy story.  So when you remove the unhappy story you are left with just the emotions and the emotions are ok, you can handle them.  If you need to cry, cry.  If you need to shout, shout.  But hold your head high, walk through that hell like the devil himself invited you.  Once you get to the other side, you’ll feel a relief like no other.

So I”m still in search of answers, I’m being my own advocate, and I’m doing it right now, in this moment, today.  I’m not telling myself stories, I’m living in truth.  I have found that I wasn’t as unhappy as I thought I was. You can’t really be unhappy without an unhappy story.

Cause I’m not there yet, but perhaps, Soon Enuff…

Peace & love

Amy

I am a published author and Master Life Coach with certifications in Happiness Therapy and Mental Abuse.  If you’d like to set an appointment with me, I’d love to talk.  Reach me @ [email protected]

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Life Changes

How to make a change

Wondering how to begin changing your life for the better? Less stress, less worry, more peace in your heart and soul.  It all starts with your morning….

Be mindful of how you spend your mornings. 

What you read or write, who you spend it with, 

this all produces energy, and only you

choose what type of energy you send out…

–Amy Lopez–

 

The necessary changes

How I spend my mornings, my space, whether inside or out, is of course going to be different then yours.  The point is though, when you wake up in the morning, it’s the most important time of the day to frame your mind with positive and energetic thoughts.

I like to wake up early because I really treasure spending my mornings alone.  I either make my coffee and sit outside on my porch or I sit inside in my comfy recliner.  I usually sit in thought (meditation) for a few moments, just clearing my mind, thinking of nothing at all.  When thoughts creep in of my busy day ahead, I try to push them away telling myself, “Plenty of time for that later.”  Then I usually do some writing, well, a lot of writing.  Then I put my pen down and pick up a book.

What I read in the morning is different then what I read later in the day.  My morning books are usually “self help” or books on Yoga.  Currently I’m reading, “Ageless Body Timeless Mind,” by Deepok Chopra and “Light on Yoga,” by B.K.S. Iyengar.  I believe what I fill my mind with early in the morning should be positivity.  Things to help de-stress and de-clutter.  Things that help me deal with anxiety, etc.

When I say I get up early, I mean early….I’m usually up a little before the sunrise.  I know this isn’t ideal for everyone, and of course I’m not promoting not getting enough sleep because I know how very important that is.  But for me personally, I need about two hours of morning alone time. I find that when I don’t get that, I tend to get more anxious and stressed, even when it isn’t really warranted, it’s just me.

Does the morning routine really make a change

I’ve had this morning routine for about two years and I can’t tell you the impact it’s had on my life.

Before, when I got up, rushed to make my coffee, immediately started my workout or started working, I was very “wound up.” By that I mean, tense, stressed and anxious.  I have suffered with anxiety attacks for about ten years, and I’ve found that rushing my morning only adds to the anxiety.

Since I’ve started being very mindful, and I suppose some would say, “selfish” morning routine I’ve been a much calmer person.  I don’t have near as many anxiety attacks because in my morning routine I practice breathing exercises to help me deal with stress, so that when it starts coming on, I’m prepared to deal with it instead of panicking.

I’m a much happier and easy going person.  I find that spending time alone in the morning has helped me realize what’s most important in life, the things I need to concentrate on and the things I need to let go of.  The things I can change and control, and the things I have no control of.  It’s helped me be more aware of how I speak to others, because I’ve learned to sit with myself in silence and speak kindly to myself.

If you don’t spend any quiet and alone time, how can you ever answer so many of life’s toughest questions?  If you’re in a constant rush to do something or be somewhere, is it any wonder that your health is declining? That your aging beyond your years?

Take it slower, even if you only have a few minutes.  Wake up a little earlier, even if it’s only fifteen minutes.  Stop rushing your morning.  See how you feel and let me know how it’s going in comment 🙂

Cause I’m not there yet but perhaps, “Soon Enuff.”

My book, “Soon Enuff” is now available worldwide on Amazon or the link on my IG @lilbitsofme22 or on FB @lilbitsofme22

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Hello and Goodbye….

Ever wish you had met someone sooner so that perhaps it had changed the course of your friendship or perhaps you could change the outcome of a situation if you had known something earlier?  I think that’s such a common thing for us all, wishing we had met someone sooner.

But what about the one you wish you hadn’t met before, the one you wish you were just saying hello to for the first time?  The one that you know if you were just meeting you wouldn’t have a past with but could make a brand new future.  The one you love and adore but because of the past there is no hope for a future together.

          Things I never told you….

          There are those I wish I had perhaps met sooner, and maybe it would have changed the course of a friendship.  But there’s one I wish I was meeting for the first time, so that our past didn’t make a future impossible.  

That morning when we kissed goodbye, I looked into those eyes in which I’ve found myself lost so many times, and my god, how I wished we were saying hello for the first time….

 

Cause I’m not there yet, but perhaps, Soon Enuff….

Love Always,

Amy